My throat is sore she mentioned in passing…
Me – What are you angry about?
My client – Erm I’m not I’m just run down from birthday celebrations.
Me – Silently thinking… that’s what you think, let me dig a little deeper.
A few well placed questions from experience later and boom there it all was sittings right under the surface waiting to be expressed!
And I’m angry about this and this and this and this… 🤬
So why did my client say she wasn’t angry?
Because she has demonised this emotion.
She has labelled it as ‘bad’ which doesn’t align with her ’good girl’ persona…
She’s also afraid of her anger!
Because she has exploded on occasion and felt as if she had no control of herself in those moments and this worries her because it was scarily reminiscent of her explosive father when she was a child.
So she unconsciously and habitually pushes anger down, it has been so out of her awareness she would say she doesn’t get angry.
She does of course because she is human, what she doesn’t do is consciously express it.
This leads to feelings of deep sadness at times that she struggles to move through, her health being impacted sometimes times on a grander scale than a sore throat, and importantly missing the messages that her anger is trying to share with her regularly landing her in situations where she feels she has been unfairly treated.
She also internalises this unexpressed anger, and whilst she dresses it up in humour, she is rather unkind to herself and is way to willing to take the blame and put herself at fault.
A recipe for burnout you might say!
Sharing this coaching space together where I am able to mirror back to her her current relationship with anger is life changing for her because now she has an expanded awareness and understanding of herself.
Now she can consciously create a new relationship with anger.
One where she feels safe to feel it, explore it and let it be in a contained and healthy way so that she can feel more happiness, better health, guide herself through life more effectively and create a more supportive relationship with herself.
Bye bye burnout 👋🏾 Hello vitality 😁
This relationship with women and anger is all too common.
I myself have been on a journey with anger and just last week another client commented that she hadn’t known it was possible to express anger in a healthy way as she too has put in the ‘bad’ box.
It’s time we women start to reclaim our whole selves for happier living and this means embracing the rejected parts of us and all our emotions knowing it’s safe for us to be fully expressed.
It is understanding ourselves on a deeper level, and evolving and healing the relationship we have with ourselves that frees us from the ties that bind us to overwhelm, anxiety and burnout.
If you are ready to heal the relationship with you to create a more fulfilling experience of life I would love to hear from you 💜