F*cked Up, Insecure, Neurotic, and Emotional!
On inside I was FINE for a long time….
Though people often referred to me as ‘having my shit together’.
I was a positive, glass half full kind of person.
So when I was sad or upset, rather than allowing myself to feel those things, I told myself to look on the bright side of life and to just get on with it.
I placed those feelings in a box and closed the lid.
And this worked for a while.
But over time that box of emotions became really full.
To bursting!
Every bit of hurt, sadness, disappointment and rejection that I had not dealt with accumulated.
I started to become upset and frustrated by the smallest of things.
It was as if I was reacting to each and every emotion locked away in the box.
But being the ‘strong one’ I put a brave face on it and carried on.
It was exhausting and it affected my health.
I had a choice…
To carry on as I was, with my health declining!
Or find a new way to do things.
I chose the latter.
Now I acknowledge my feelings and deal with them as they arise.
My box is empty and I have a greater tolerance for stress and adversity.
And my health has been restored.
Here’s hows –
- I am honest with myself – I acknowledge my feelings as they arise. I now know when you numb yourself to sadness you also numb yourself to happiness.
- I learned that we have we have 8 primary emotions – interest, fear, surprise, sadness, disgust, anger, shame and joy and that feeling all of them is part of experiencing life.
- I founds tools and outlets for my emotions – I like journaling and I got myself a mindset coach.
Life is too short to be FINE.
I choose to be real instead.
